I think the person I was before I was diagnosed with papillary carcinoma and BRAF positive gene mutation on one side of my thyroid AND medullary carcinoma with RET mutation on the other side that metastasized to lymph nodes – hence stage III because of the giant size of my tumor – a rare combination of 2 totally different cancer types in one organ, actually there are only 6 medically followed up and registered cases I find on the internet with similar variant, unfortunately all patients died within 10 years after diagnoses. They all had RAI which is radioactive iodine treatment for the papillary variant, there is no medical “treatment” for medullary carcinoma, they are unable to create a poison that attacks the C-cell that is, and thank God for that! – in April 2017 is exactly the same person who is writing these blogs now (started a year later), but the cold fact that life as we know it really ends even for me (and perhaps sooner than I have anticipated) had shaped how I express myself these days. Before diagnoses I have led my life as “I was supposed to” – well, most of the times. I will write about this later in greater details perhaps.
Before my cancer diagnoses I have seldom left any task undone from a very young age, or refused giving a hand to anyone. I have worked more than 200 hours per month for the past 14 years building up my architectural company and helped my husband’s company every time my help was needed. I truly forgot to hold on to my dreams and greatly neglected my health. Most women fall into this pit as we learn to be “good girls” by the age of 2, so I am really not “special” in this sense. It is worrysome though, because I am certain there are lot’s of cancer patients who’s emotional backround is very similar to mine.
Thyroid cancer to me equals the imbalance or shall we say the suppression or total suffocation of the 5th chakra *throat chakra*.
In 2000 I had my first surgery on my thyroid, half of it was removed because there was a lump growing to be so big that it nearly choked me. That time the lump was not malignant, and I asked my doctor to leave the other half intact so I can lead a somewhat normal life afterwards. That time I still believed I could have a huge family with five kids, my all times dream. Well, it never happened, I have developed other diseases like endometriosis, celiac, and finally in 2014 Graves disease that enhanced the development of arrythmia of my heart, a disease I will not be able to correct even with the most strict diet. I believe that my Graves’ disease had been treated with too large doses of thyroid hormone suppressant medication and way too long (3 years to be exact and medical journals state that these meds most probably create cancer once used for more than 2 years) that eventually led to cancer of the thyroid. It is medically proven, everyone can read about this in medical journals. I will write about this later, most probably this needs its own page and the subject is rather delicate and I really am not here to judge anyone.
After spending 3 weeks in a health promoting centre in Thailand this summer I have decided to take upon the advice of a very kind person who’s sister had been treated in the same centre to start writing a blog about my journey as a cancer fighting woman. I am not hiding the fact that I was reluctant to publish anything unless I was confident that all I wrote was impeccable. Writing about myself, my illness, my journey, anything personal is truly not what I have ever done before, so I take this blog as part of my personal growth as well. A bit like therapy of a kind.
Supporting my journey first and far most is my husband, my wonderful and huge family in Hungary and my dear friends from all over the World.
It’s your road, and yours alone. Others may walk it with you but no one can walk it for you.